Official guidance for situations that did not need to become this serious.

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What is this?

Official Protocols for Unofficial Problems is a comedy book about the small awkward moments everyone recognises but no one knows how to formally report.

Each entry treats a minor everyday problem as a serious administrative incident requiring assessment, classification, and recommended action.

It is not self-help.
It is not therapy.
It is not legally binding.
It is paperwork for the emotionally inconvenienced.

Submit an unofficial problem

Members of the public may submit minor incidents for departmental review. Please include only situations that were too small to mention at the time and too persistent to forget.

Submissions may be ignored, reviewed, classified, or quietly understood. High-quality reports may be credited in future book or post materials.